This important decision could change your life forever

The importance decision making plays in our lives

As human beings, we have to take decisions each moment of our life in one way or the other. Some decisions needs to be done instantly and for some you could take your time. However, there is one decision very important that you need to take immediately to change the course of your life. I am going to explain that in this article.

As I sit down to write this, two contrasting thoughts sail across my mind and kind of makes me to choose one. Here are the two thoughts for you to discern

1. Be one among the crowd, have a good all round life and just fade away along with the millions who take this course
2. Be among that 0.01% who long to live that extraordinary life to do something to change the world and leave a mark for themselves when they move away.

As you know, both the choices have their fair share of pros and cons, but when asked to take a stand, where would you go and what will you choose?

If you can decide on this, I assure that you can live the rest of your life in a much more meaningful way without shooting aimlessly in the dark.

If you want to understand this better, Go to the countryside and look out for a few old and happy faces. These are folks who have sculpted their life meticulously in the most traditional way as possible. They had personal and financial discipline that enabled them to save money for the future and that provides them enough to enjoy their final leg of life without much pressure.

On the contrary, look at the swashbuckling CEO’s and startup founders who have exceedingly surplus bank balances at a very early age. Of course, they have squeezed out every ounce of their energy and time to achieve this kind of success that guarantees them and their future generations a very bright future.

Now, the most important thing to understand here is the concept of saving vs making money. Category 1 are big time savers who worked hard all by themselves and saved each and every penny, and category 2 are money makers who have made others work for them to generate more and more money.

And now, it is decision time….

If you want to really enjoy life without confusions, it is very important to choose your approach to your life today and align toward your choice. Pick either one of these approaches, relax and enjoy your life. Don’t get caught up between dreams and reality and be lost forever! Life is fleeting and too short to miss!

Your looks matter – Is it?

It was a cold Morning in Washington DC and a young man took a violin out of its case and brought it to his shoulder to a playing position. He wasn’t looking that great, wearing just a simple jeans and a T-shirt. He was wearing a baseball cap and had a wavy brown hair.

After tuning his violin to perfection, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a few dollars, which he threw into the violin case, with the hopes that perhaps a few passers-by might do the same. It was a busy morning in L’Enfant Plaza metro station where the young man began to play.

Thousands of people were on their way to work, school, home, or wherever they were going. And it was noisy – trains coming and going and the rush of the crowd, many on their cellphones chattering away. Yet through the busyness, the sound of this man’s violin filled the metro station.

It was impossible to ignore.

Or was it?

Over 43 minutes, more than 1,000 people walked through the doors where Joshua Bell was playing. And if he was any other busker, perhaps it would have been insignificant that he received just a handful of change and the attention of just a few people.

But Joshua Bell wasn’t just any busker. He was… and is… perhaps the world’s most renowned violinist. And he was playing one of the most difficult pieces ever composed. And that piece was being played on a $3 million violin that emitted one of the most beautiful sounds in the world.

Yet almost nobody noticed…Why?

Because he didn’t look like anyone special…

Folks, this is how people treat you when you don’t present yourself in the way that you should. At times, we neglect to take care of our personal brand and it is only “we” who can make ourselves special!

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The Ultimate Fact about Money

Money…Money….Money, the sound, and smell of currency excites all of us. We try every possible means to earn as much as we can. Sometimes, all our desperation just leads to exhaustion as we wear us out and conclude on a philosophical note that “Well, Money isn’t everything in life” only to see ourselves riding more vigorously on the currency wave again and the cycle repeats itself!

What’s so interesting about money that we all die to have more and more of it? Allow me to demonstrate it to you with an analogy. Assume that you are driving on a highway with full fuel.

What would be your state of mind now? You won’t be bothered much about finding the nearest fuel station and would be just enjoying the journey to its fullness. On the other hand, if you are running on low fuel, you would be very anxious and would be on the look out for the nearest fuel station. You will lose interest in your journey and the worry of finding out the nearest fuel station will occupy your mind.

So, What does money ultimately allow you to do in life? The million dollar answer is “TO LIVE WITH FREEDOM”.

 

All of us are entitled to live with freedom and hence with a lot of money that would aid it. Just go for it!

Eliminate these bad habits and take control of your life now!

Are you so much worried about what you are doing with your life currently? Do you think that if you continue this way any further, you are going to hit the dead end soon? Here is some good news for you! You have the power to change your life, and more importantly, you can do it now!

The power of habits

Our lives are shaped up predominantly by our habits. It is said that if we can practice doing something continuously for 21 days, it becomes imbibed in us and we become inhabited with it. Talking about habits, it is essential that we inculcate good habits and eliminate those which are detrimental. In this post, let us look at some habits that we should get rid off immediately so that we can take control of our lives again

1. Stop watching too much TV – Yes, TV is addictive, be it sports, operas or movies. They captivate you, keep you engrossed in viewing and finally make you lose valuable time and energy
2. Stop eating too much junk food – We all love junk food as it tastes awesome. But, never forget the fact that these unhealthy and unhygienic food stuffs wreck havoc on our health in the longer run
3. Saying too much “Yes” – Are you an ever “Yes” person? Think about it, you may not have the time to please everyone
4. Staying too much in comfort zone – A butterfly isn’t one till it breaks and comes out of the cocoon. You don’t become what you want to be, unless you come out of your cozy comfort zones that you have built around you
5. Stop talking too much – All of us have two ears and one mouth. Think about it!
6. Stop complaining too much – Complaining doesn’t change an inch of anything for you. It just makes you feel much worse
7. Stop spending too much money – A penny saved is a penny earned! Always have this in mind when you are tempted to spend aimlessly
8.  Stop aimless browsing – Spend your time judiciously on the internet. Too much flirting with it can be potentially dangerous
9. Stop romancing your smartphone – The “smart” phone actually makes you “dumb”
10. Stop too much drinking and smoking – Well, you know what I mean and it doesn’t need any further explanation

If not for all, if we can just eliminate a couple of bad habits from this list, we can really see some great changes in our life.

When do you know that you are really matured?

There used to be this very calm and composed person whom I thought to be highly matured. I started to discuss things related to life, psychology, philosophy etc with her but none of these conversations were really fruitful. The more I tried to cheer her up, the lesser she interacted and I really didn’t get a clue on what sort of person she was.

Then one day, I saw her chit chatting on very silly and petty things with her friends. This is when it dawned upon me that people have different levels of maturity and you need to be prepared when you interact or deal with them. Would you be talking philosophy with someone who is at the level of discussing about chocolates?

There are a few clues that you can make use of to know your maturity level as well as the maturity level of those around you.

1. Would you be able to walk away from an argument instead of going ahead with it in full throttle? Matured people know how to overlook an insult and they don’t make a big show out of it.
2. All of us have tough times in life, but when you are really matured, you don’t show your frustration to the outside world. It all stops with you. Why should you yell at your neighbor or co worker just because you are in a bad mood?
3. When the level of your selfishness decreases, you can consider it as a sign that you are getting matured.
4. Do you post your feelings, moods and every other personal stuff on the social media for the world to see? You need to mature further.
5. Do you have the habit of intruding into the privacy of the lives of others? Curious cat!. Matured people give importance to their privacy as well as the privacy of others
6. You are matured when you realize that around 95% of the time, people would be wrong in whatever they do
7. You are matured when you reduce your complaining attitude and start adjusting on things
8. When you are polite and develop a genuine respect and affection for people, you can be sure that you are matured
9. As a matured person, you are ready to face crisis in life rather than just evading them
10. You don’t do some things just to grab the attention of others anymore because you are matured

Maturity is what makes you to take charge of your life first. Only then you would be able to appreciate others and go on with life irrespective of being approved or rejected by others around you.

I think this picture sums it all on what is maturity. You need not be too old to become a mature person, isn’t it?

How to proceed with something without worrying about the outcome?

The other day, I was eating my dinner buffet along with a few of my friends. The place was crowded and they had some awesome and mouthwatering dishes in the counter. I had soup, starters and then finished the main course. Now is the time for some exciting desserts and the spread was simply exotic. But, there were a guy behind each of those items and he would distribute the desserts to you. I had a bowl of ice cream and halwa and it was simply mouthwatering. I really wanted to go for another round but again different thoughts started to creep up in my mind.

What if the guy says second servings are not allowed and my friends start ridiculing me? I would get up from my seat and then sit back after thinking about the outcome. I did this for two or three times and then finally decided that I am not gonna go for it. I left that place in despair.

Why am I saying this? It is very much relevant to today’s topic. Let us assume that you start liking a very attractive woman and really want to take her out for a coffee. You start contemplating in your mind on how to approach her and convey your wish. You keep thinking, thinking and are going nowhere . What if she says “No” and I lose the opportunity to talk with her any further?

Finally, you muster enough courage, go to her and request her for a coffee outing and to your surprise she says “Lets go”. There you are, since you acted with courage without contemplating much on the outcome, you were able to take the woman out!

Now, apply this to every aspect of your life. If you like something and find it reasonably good to ask or go ahead, never think otherwise. Just go for it and 8 out of 10 times you will definitely succeed. It is always better to die trying rather than just relaxing in despair!

My learning from a cab driver

“Sir, I am 26 and I want to employ at least one person before I get married at 28, so that I will have the satisfaction that a family depends on me for their livelihood” said the smart cab driver in Chennai when I asked him about his future plans.

I just hopped into one of these famous tech enabled cabs in Chennai on my ride back from the office. This time,  my driver was a very enthusiastic and lively young person. Immediately after getting in, he asked me if I want to charge my mobile phone and when I said, “its ok, I have enough charge”, he shifted the topic to AC in the car saying that most of the customers don’t understand the prevailing heat wave and expect the car’s cabin to be very cool as soon as they enter inside. “Oh, they never understand it Sir, and so I always tell them that there is a small problem in the AC and I will fix it”. A super smart guy!

On conversing further, I happened to know that this guy hails from the southern districts of Tamil Nadu and he has completed his diploma in Electrical engineering and was working in marketing, sales and BPO’s before clinching onto the steering wheel for his livelihood. This was evident from his communication skills.

He has good knowledge of the US tech market as well as Tamil Nadu politics and this shows that he reads and comprehends the current affairs very well.

Now, coming to the most important point in our discussion. He told me in a very casual way…”Sir, I didn’t like the jobs that I was doing earlier because I was not able to give my 100% to it. But now, I enjoy this driving job to the core, and at the end of the day, I make good money and most importantly, I have high level of job satisfaction”.

My roommates are working in prominent IT companies and my earning as a cab driver is also matching to what they earn. But, I need to pay my monthly due for the car and take care of its maintenance. Oh, Yeah?, I said “IT employees have much more loans and unwanted expenses, and you are far better”!

He wants to close down the loan on the present car that he is driving and want to purchase another one soon. He is very thoughtful when he said “Sir, only when people are educated, their behavior will change and customer service will improve”, Truly, golden words to be remembered ever.

It was time for me to get down, but I thought to myself that this guy would one day be running a big cab service company as he has got the passion, grit and determination to do it. After rubbing my thoughts with him, I am inspired to do my work even better than what I am doing now.

As I said good bye after tipping him, he didn’t want to take the tip. I insisted that you should have it as I have had a good motivational session with you and the tip that I offer you is very less when compared to the value that I imbibed from your talk.

Let India produce more youth like this cab driver. If this happens, We can safely say that India is on its way to the elite league. Till then, let us keep motivating each other and do our work properly!

 

 

Social media posts – Is it worth the effort to please people?

Money, fame and accolades…Who wouldn’t like these huge tempters in life? Though, some may say that they practice austerity and are humble and down to earth, you can see that most of us are bent upon gaining more and more of these stuffs.

You envy the popularity of those politicians, sports persons and movie starts, don’t you? These days we have many stars in the social media too. These guys post interesting and entertaining posts on politics, sports and the movie industry. They are showered with likes and comments by their fans. It is a great feeling to have when you are admired by the mammoth followers in the social media.

It is good if people appreciate and acknowledge you, but the problem is when you desperately try to do something with the sole intention of securing the adulation of people. This would really work in a negative way. The reason, you lose your individuality and creativity and just try to position yourself in a people pleasing manner. If you don’t get the attention that you desire, you become frustrated and curse everybody. Sounds familiar?

I recently read a famous weather blogger saying that he doesn’t do weather forecasting in social media for the sake of getting “likes” from people, rather he is doing it because he is very passionate about it. The result, he has more than a lakh followers now. This is due to his timely and accurate weather predictions when people needed it the most.

On the other hand, there are these social “entertainers” whose memes and fun videos too get lot of traction and attention from people. This shows that entertainment sells in a big way. But again, the intention is to be creative and appeal to people rather than just focusing on getting those “likes” and “comments”.

Let me come to the point of today’s post, “Don’t do anything  just for the sake of publicity” and if you do, you will be disappointed for sure. The recent assembly elections in Tamil Nadu is a huge testimony for it. Those who just tried to fool people through unnecessary publicity were sidelined.

You will lose your identity and individuality if you just try to please people all the time. Yes, I agree that you may rub on the wrong sides of people if you are not pleasing them, but ultimately somebody will realize that you are doing something for a cause and is of value rather than just eating the feed and wall spaces of people.

These days, news on rumors, grapevine and masala sell more than facts and essentials of life. People are hard pressed for fun and entertainment in this busy world and it makes sense to post lighter stuff to make them happy.

On the contrary, there are a few who like posts that appeal to their emotions, like fighting for a social cause etc. Be it whatever, It is better to handle the social media posts in a wise manner. Of course, all these apply to people who are very active and contribute on the social media.

Social media is fun and it offers lot of value. There is always this enormous stress on the content creators regarding the reach of their content and they just keep thinking,  tweaking and re-phrasing each and every post. At least for that effort, let us “like” them.

 

What matters the most in life?

A rich man closes his eyes as he lies on the bed, his head slightly raised over a soft pillow. He has money, lots of it and yet he is not happy. He finds it difficult to fall asleep and starts reflecting on his early life, one that was tough with lot of limitations, where he had to run everywhere for money, doing all sorts of work that he could. He used to cherish the moments when somebody stashed those currency notes in his hand for his hard work. Hard earned money, Huh, it really smells good!

Those days, whenever he got money, he used to rush to his home, purchasing some eatables on the way to be shared with his two lovely children and an understanding wife. They used to sit together, talk on and on…about everything, without any limit or inhibition. The children were very happy, they had huge amount of sibling bonding as they supported each other in every situation. The whole family stood for each other as they had nothing but love to offer. When there was a need for money, the father would run, pawn something and bring the needed money. He never considered it as a burden and more importantly, the smile he saw on the family’s face made him forget all his worries. Who said poor are unhappy?

The family lived in an unfinished home with no proper flooring, no proper toilets and in summers the heat waves would plummet the place and yet the family bore it all with a smile. They used to hang wet clothes over the doors and windows to bring down the heat inside the home.  Creative, isn’t it?

Though  scrapping for money, the  love and affection between each other in the family was intact and that really worked like a magic in his life. He felt strong as he had his family firmly behind him, supporting all his decisions unanimously and loving him unconditionally.

As the story would would fast forward, after working hard for so many years and through a stroke of luck, he made lot of money and became one of the wealthiest person in the neighborhood. The children have grown up now and his wife has become old. Now, what is wrong, as he continues reflecting his earlier life. “If I make lots of money, all my problems would be solved and I will be happy” has always been his thought. But, now after making his dream come true, he is suffering emotionally and is sleepless for many nights.

As he made more and more money, than what is required, he started to distance himself from his family. He had to travel all over the world and hence could spend only a few days a year with his family. The emotional bonding started to fall apart. Not spending enough time with each other will definitely erode the warmth in any relationship. When he came home every time, as each of them had separate luxurious rooms, none bothered to come out and have a open minded chat with him. They just spoke for formality as compared to those early days where they used to converse in that small and unfinished house for hours together; a distant dream now. Is it possible to return back to that state of joy and Ecstasy ? No, No…Nobody would like to sacrifice luxury and money for family bonding.

They never had mobile phones back then, but visited all their relatives quite often; though they never had enough to eat, all of them were willing to sacrifice a meal so that the other can eat. Now, each one had more than one mobile phone, but no desire to communicate with the relatives. The kitchen had too many varieties of food, but there was nobody to serve with love. Are all these punishments one has to undergo for becoming rich? What has really changed? Nothing much, than that magical factor called time. Money really stole the time that each person had for the other. Now, every thought is fixed only on money and how to utilize every bit of time to make maximum money…

Money…Money…Money…is the resonating sound everywhere. Is it worth to chase money with this ferocious madness? Is it wise to sacrifice the family bonding for the sake of money? Listen to your heart, listen to that small inner sound which would tell you otherwise. No, No, it is not at all worth to sacrifice that golden period of life in the pursuit of making money, thereby neglecting the family love and bonding. When you close your eyes for one final time, you cannot take money with you, but only memories..those sweet memories that you spend with your loved ones. Make reasonable money to support a good lifestyle, don’t worry about saving everything for the future as you never know what would happen tomorrow. Enjoy every day, love all and serve all. This is the essence of life, a beautiful life!

 

 

Different wiring and hence different mindset

The biggest problem in dealing with people is the tendency to assume that everyone will be similar to us. We think that everybody will have the same kind of problems, pressures, likes, dislikes and family situations. What is even more important is that we assume that everybody will deal with stuff in life in the same way as we do. This is where it gets highly complicated.

Your friend may deal with a high pressure situation in a very composed way whereas you may lose your temper on it. One of your friend might not take anything personal, but you tend to take each and every saying as personal and attach a meaning to it. We are all grossly different and we should understand and admit it.

We are all wired differently. You see the cars, different cars have different specifications. An SUV can easily handle tough roads whereas a sedan is not designed for that. It is built differently. The closest example that I can give is with respect to our physical built. All of us are not same in terms of strength, stamina, body structure and endurance. You may be as lean as a stick but your friend might have ripped up some serious muscle.

When you lift a serious weight without preparing your body for it, you will break a few bones. The same holds good with your emotional and mental strength too. If you have not flexed your mental and emotional muscles, even small things will put you down. You will be frustrated, disappointed, anxious and may be even cry and lose your composure.

Have you seen the way a few folks in sports and politics handle pressure? You may even slam them with anything, but they are unperturbed. How is that possible? It is because they have really made up their mind to take anything on their stride. May be, previous situations in their lives could have made them tough.

The greatest comforting factor is that we can change our mental wiring by changing the thinking process. As how a lean and weak person can develop a chiseled structure through rigorous physical training, a person who is weak emotionally and mentally can become strong if they chose to improve on it. Here are a few things that would help you to get started if you want to become strong mentally.

1. Admit the fact that life is tough and it will have lot of uncertainties and that things won’t always go in the manner that you expect them to go. People may not be always the same as you expect them to be. Learn to accept that life is not fair all the time and you have to be flexible and adaptable. If things don’t go the way as you expected, accept them as they are and move on with the next. Never get stuck in anything for a long time.
2. It is great to have a mentor who can shape up your life. People neglect this very important factor. If your parents or loved ones cannot back you up unfortunately, seek professional help. It is a good idea to work with a life coach or a motivator who can absorb your worries and infuse a fresh perspective in your life frequently. It is worth an investment to find a good mentor and get associated with them
3. Learn to conquer your fears. In other words, don’t run away from problems. Develop the guts to face them. If something is disturbing your mind for a long time, bring that out in the most effective way. If it is something like you are not able to talk with someone or get introduced, take a moment, assure yourself that no matter what happens, you are going to initiate a conversation with that person without worrying about the result. Trust me, people really like to talk and share their mind. You just need to get out of the starting trouble

We can be differently wired, but often times, this wiring need to be tweaked here and there, so that life moves on and you are not stuck anywhere abruptly.